NEWT: Self-Discovery: 1.
by PinkyA

Newt was getting ready for what should have been an exciting day. It was a Sunday. He had only recently turned eighteen and tomorrow he was going to have his first day at college in Hollyoaks, specializing in Art, English, Music and Social Studies. He didn't much care what the other students might think of his Emo style; in fact he had taken it further recently and added a thin scarlet red streak to the front of his black hair, also a red and black swirly tattoo of a newt on his left upper arm, much to Frankie's annoyance - but there was not much she could do about it once it had been done. He had taken to co-ordinating his red hair streak with black T shirts with any kind of red logo he could find. He was sitting on the end of his bed, getting his books and notebooks together for his first day, along with the forms he had filled in to get registered at the college. He had almost begun to relax enough to really look forward to it.

The big cloud that hung over his evening was the antics of Lauren and Anita. He had stayed friends with them both after various incidents that had eventually made him disentangle himself from any romantic involvement with either of them, but they both remained affectionate, hugging him whenever he saw them, and both of them insisted on seeing him on certain days of the week. In the end he had decided to date both of them occasionally, while conveniently forgetting to tell each of them that he was seeing the other one. It seemed to Newt that this was the only way to stop them killing each other - by keeping them both satisfied. Unfortunately they had both recently discovered what he was doing, or rather, Anita had found out and blabbed to Lauren. And instead of them both finishing with him - surprise surprise, they were arguing and having fights over him, all over again. So he had decided to try not to see either of them for a while, if he could possibly help it. Their bickering and fighting was getting on his nerves, even though he had been in love with Lauren at one time, and had become very fond of Anita. For Newt, seeing girls physically fighting was something that turned his stomach - especially if they were fighting over him. It seemed so undignified. And today they had pushed and pulled each other around in the street, much to Steph and Cindy's amusement, right outside MOBs. There had been hair-pulling, name calling; and Anita had finally managed to give Lauren a black eye, which surprised Newt, since Anita was scared of Lauren most of the time, and seemed the weakest of the two. In the end, he had had to go between the two of them and break it up.
"Come on you two" he had said, trying to keep his voice even. "You're acting worse than the McQueen sisters, both of you! Let's sit down and talk about it."
He had taken them to sit on the low wall near the fountain, to try to work things out, but they had both sulked and refused to speak to each other. It was then that he began to realize that if he did go back to just one of them, whichever one he chose, it would still feel like revisiting the past, and not like having a fresh new love life for the future. Deep down, he really simply wanted to be free for a while.
"I'm starting at college tomorrow" he told them, with his arms round each of their shoulders. "I need to make a good start on my course work there. So it's probably a good idea if neither of you text or call me until the weekend."
"Oh that's nice, after everything I've done for you over the years" said Lauren. She got up and walked away, shooting him a cold glance over her shoulder.
"Yeah, like beating up your friends" muttered Anita, when she was out of earshot. Newt had given her a serious look.
"You know you mean a lot to me Anita" he told her. "But I need to get my head straight before deciding what to do."
"You don't have to explain" Anita had said, standing up as she pulled away from him. "You just want to check out the college girls, to see if anything more interesting comes along. Well, look me up if you get disappointed, and if I'm bored enough, I might call you back if you leave a message."
Then Anita had flounced off, leaving him sitting alone on the wall, not knowing whether to laugh or cry.

He went back home to his room, took out his mobile and tried calling his real mum again. There was something he had been asking her on and off for weeks now, and she still hadn't given him a straight answer. He was surprised when she picked up after two rings.
"Hello Barry" she sighed. She had obviously got call screening on, or a ringtone that identified him. "I guess you still want to know the name of your real Dad. I suppose I'll have to tell you in the end."
"Yeah" he said, still feeling choked from his conversation with Lauren and Anita. "I suppose you will."
"Well this might surprise you" she said, "but I used to live in Hollyoaks village. While I lived there I met a man who was good-looking and a bit of a player. He really strung me along for a long time; I thought I was in love with him. We stayed in this shared house, with a few other..."
"Yeah yeah... I think you told me all that before once" said Newt. "You never said his name though. Cut the crap, Mum, who was it? I'm eighteen now, don't I deserve to know who my real father is after all this time?"
He stood leaning his hand against the back of Frankie's sofa, quivering slightly as he waited. Finally his answer came. It cut through him like a lightning bolt, when she said the name. He sank down into the sofa, wide-eyed and shivering.
"What?!" he gasped.
"You know him?" said his mum. Newt was only half-listening now. "You could say that." his voice was unsteady. "Listen, I have to go now" he managed to say. "Laters Mum." He hung up before she could ask what was wrong. Then he doubled over and put his head in his hands as an agony of sobbing overcame him. He could repress the sobs and make them silent, but somehow he couldn't make them stop. When he heard the front door open, he leapt up and locked the door of his room, in case anyone might hear. This pain was not for anyone else's eyes or ears. He would have to endure it alone for as long as it lasted, then wash his face and then think about going to confront the man who had helped to put him into the world.

That man was the last person in the world he would have thought it would be. It was someone he had many reasons to hate...


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To be continued. MWHA HAHA HA HA HAAAA!!!

OK here is Episode #2...

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 2.

Why did she never tell me before? thought Newt, as his tears began to ease up.
He shook his head and ran his hands agitatedly through his hair.
All those times when he could have looked after me, when she was too stoned to bother! That children's home... maybe I might never have needed to go there! My schizophrenia might never have come to the surface!
He bit his lower lip and leaned back against the pillows, swinging his legs up onto the bed. Some of his CDs avalanched onto the floor. He leaned down and reached under the bed. His fingers closed on an old diary that he used to keep in the children's home. He pulled it out, blew the dust off it and opened it at a random page.


March 15th, Wednesday

It's exactly four weeks since Eli Samuels hung himself in the gym. I still can't forget the terrible blank look in his eyes as they cut him down from the beam, or the way I felt when they took him out with his whole face and body covered up. At least the bullying has quietened down, as some of the guys knew he was my best friend, but Wallsie still comes up and gives me a dead arm sometimes in the corridor. Maybe he'll get bored with doing that one day. Perhaps one day I'll grow taller than him and give him two dead arms. Or a flat face.

Mum came to visit me yesterday; and she held me for a while after I broke down trying to tell her about how Eli's death was getting to me. It helped for a while, but not much, as I knew she would be going back home again after six. I asked her when she would be taking me home, but she said the social worker had said she wasn't allowed to until she could prove she wasn't a junkie anymore.

The worst thing is how Mr. Peterson keeps trying to touch me after we all come out from gym. Fortunately it's not only me he picks on. I'm just glad the showers have doors that lock! I have tried to tell Mum about that before and she keeps saying she'll mention it to them. But I know her memory is bad. Still I wish she could do something, he makes me feel sick when he comes creeping after me.

Eli can't stand up for me any more now. He can't help me with the bullies or with Mr. Peterson any more. It's freaking me out now he's gone. Sometimes I dream that he's talking to me, then I wake up and realize it was just a dream. Other times I swear I can still see him walking towards me in the corridor, or I seem to catch sight of him out of the corner of my eye. But he's not here any more - there is nothing but the bullies and the creepy Mr. Peterson. It's tearing me up inside.

Maybe I'll run away. Or maybe I'll do what Eli did, then they'll all be sorry.


Newt couldn't read any more. Looking back at all the bad memories was not helping him to get his emotions back under control; the page was a watery blur before his eyes. So he closed the diary, reached down and threw it too far under the bed to reach it easily again. He closed his eyes once more, trying to clear his head of the terrible memories. Another tear slid down his cheek, taking a streak of black eyeliner with it.

You could have helped me back then, Dad, he thought. You could have made it all go away.

He took a deep breath and picked up his mobile phone from the drawer unit next to his bed, and phoned Directory Enquiries to get the number of the business owned by the man he now knew to be his father. As soon as he had it, he programmed it into his phone and dialled it.
The familiar voice that answered sounded the same as it always did, but still made him jump.
"Hello?"
"Hi" said Newt. "It's Newt here, though you would probably call me Barry."
"Oh. Well, what do you want? You've never phoned us here before. You could always call in; you're old enough to drink here now."
"Yeah I know. It's not about any events you've got coming up..."
"Are you all right?" The voice interrupted. "You sound a bit shaky."
"Well, yeah and no" said Newt. "I need... I need to speak to you about something."
"Well look, I'm a bit busy at the moment. I'm doing the books."
"This is important" Newt insisted. "You really need to know this."
"Oh, right. Well it better not be a wind-up of some kind." His tone was suspicious, but half-joking.
"No, this is deadly-serious" Newt assured him. "Can I come round in about half an hour?"
He heard the man sigh.
Do I sigh in a similar way to him? Newt wondered. He had not tried to look that closely at him before, to see any family mannerisms.
"All right" said the voice, in a wary tone. "I can spare an hour or so - no more."
"Great... see you in half an hour." Newt had to consciously try very hard to keep his voice steady.
"OK, see you then. 'Bye."

Newt crept out of his room so as not to alert Frankie downstairs, and went to the bathroom, where he borrowed some of her makeup remover to take the black smudges away from under his eyes. Then he washed his face with cold water, dried it and re-applied his eyeliner, using a waterproof one, since he had the feeling he might need it. He looked at his reflection again and grimaced. His eyes and nose still looked reddened from crying. He rummaged through Frankie's makeup bag and found nothing that would help to conceal it. Then there was a knock on the door.
"Could you hurry up in there please?" It was Cindy's voice. Newt had forgotten she had come over to see Frankie. His heart sank.
"Bite me, Cinders" he replied. Cindy was not amused. She rattled the doorhandle angrily.
"You come out of there soon, Donnie Darko, or I'll break the door down, come in there and bite your head off!"
"Ooo, I'm like, so scared now" said Newt, without even turning his head to look at the door.
"Look, please hurry up" she said, trying a different approach. "I'm desperate!"
Nothing worse than a desperate tart he thought. He decided that perhaps he should unlock the door after all, so finally, he did.
"Thank you!" she said, in an irritable tone, then she noticed his red eyes.
"Are you all right, Newt?" she asked, more quietly. "You look like you've been..."
"Well I haven't" he snapped. "And you wouldn't care if I had."
He disliked the way she was standing a little too close for comfort. He was having to stand with his back against the wall, and the corridor was not very wide.
"It's nothing I could help you with then?" she asked. To his amazement, she put her hand on his shoulder. He flinched, stepping away from her.
"No, it really isn't" he said. "I need to be somewhere else soon anyway. The bathroom's free now - enjoy!"
He opened the bathroom door a little wider and hurried away. At that moment, Cindy's help was the last thing he needed or wanted, when she was probably just being nosy. He went into his room for just long enough to grab his leather jacket, then ran down the stairs and out of the door, slamming it behind him.

Newt walked around the block a few times before going to where his father worked, breathing deeply to clear his head and quell the turmoil in his mind. He soon found himself at the building, with just five minutes to go before it was time to meet the man. He walked round to the back of the building and up the fire escape, knowing that this was the best way to reach the owner when the place was closed. He took a few more deep breaths and knocked on the door.
"Who's out there?" asked that same familiar voice he had spoken to on the phone.
"It's Newt."
"Oh right. Hold on a minute."
There was a rattling sound, as the fire door bar was lifted. The door opened inwards and Newt walked in.

He had not seen the office at the back of the building before. It was fairly small and gloomy, with one work lamp. There was a safe in the opposite corner. On the desk there were two bags of white powder; Newt guessed it was certainly not sherbet or custard powder. He looked away from them quickly and met the steady, slightly daunting gaze of the man in front of him.

"Well then" said Warren, folding his arms. "What have you come to see me about?"
Newt folded his arms in a reflex movement, unaware that he was copying Warren.
"Well, it's like this" Newt said, hesitantly. "Do you remember a woman called Sheryl? Blonde hair and blue eyes?"
Warren frowned.
"Not really" he said. "Oh wait a minute, yes I do. We had a bit of a thing for a few months, God, it was over ten years ago now. More like eighteen years, maybe. Pretty, but very neurotic. She was a bit more keen than I was. Why, is she looking for me or something?"
"No" said Newt. "But she knows I was coming to see you. She er... well she had a baby after you split up."
"Oh so that's it" said Warren, half to himself. "She wants maintenance money." He looked annoyed.
"No no, that's not it." Newt swallowed nervously, shaking his head. "Can you remember what her surname is?" he asked, hoping that perhaps he wouldn't, and that he had imagined what his mum had said.
"No." Warren frowned. "Well maybe... it was something like Nanten, or Needham..."
"Or Newton?" Newt filled in the gap in his memory for him. "Yeah, Newton, like, where my nickname Newt comes from. I'm not named after an amphibian, Warren.
My real name is Barry Newton. Sheryl's my mum. Do you.... get what I'm saying?"
Warren's eyes widened. He had to steady himself against the safe for a moment.
"You're my son?!" he whispered. "Have you come here to tell me because you need money or something?"
To Newt, this seemed typical of the sort of thing that Warren would say, yet it stung him.
"No" he whispered back, suddenly feeling close to tears. "I just need my dad."
He swallowed hard as he looked at Warren's shocked expression. There was nothing left for him to do now but stand there, helplessly wondering what his father would do now....


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To be continued.....

OK here is Episode #3... this one has an illustration...

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 3.
by PinkyA

Warren stood and stared at Newt, for what seemed like an eternity. Newt shifted his feet uncomfortably. Warren began walking around him, looking him up and down as if appraising his appearance for the first time.
"Well Newt, you look pretty weird, as always, but that's normal for most teenagers" he said. "And under that makeup and hair dye, there's a reasonable-looking young man. You're bright as well, from what I've heard. It's just... kind of hard to get my head round this."
He looked at Newt again, standing slightly nearer. Newt was amazed to see tears in his eyes, which brought his own tears on again.
"Yeah I know" he said haltingly. "I can't believe it either. But it's true."
Warren shook his head slowly, in wonder.
"My son!" he said. "Come here." He gave Newt a hug. Newt made a sound that was almost a laugh but sounded more like a sob, as he hugged Warren. He wanted to say "Dad" but couldn't find his voice for a while.

Warren stood back from him to look at him again.
"Sit down" he said. "We've got some time to talk. Do you want a beer?"
Newt nodded, glad of wearing waterproof eyeliner, by this time. Warren went out of the office and came back with two bottled lagers from the fridge, and handed him one. He swigged it gratefully, letting it ease the emotional tension in his throat. When he put the bottle down on the desk, he saw that Warren was sitting on the opposite side of the desk, smiling at him, with his arms folded again.
"So, what have you been doing with yourself since you left school?" he asked. "Are you going to college yet?"
"My first day at college is tomorrow" said Newt.
"Are you looking forward to it?"
Newt thought about this.
"Kind of" he answered. "But it's chaos at home. Well, in my spare time, you know."
"Oh, why's that?" Warren took a swig of his own beer and eyed Newt curiously.
"Girl trouble" sighed Newt, making a face. Warren smiled, intrigued by now.
"Really?" He leaned forward.
"Yeah. Lauren Valentine and Anita Roy. My ex and my most recent girlfriend. I was going out with them both for a while, then they found out about it, now they both want to know which one I want to choose. And they hate each other." He studied the desk for a while, then glanced up at Warren. Warren smiled. Then he laughed and laughed. He patted Newt's arm.
"Oh that's great!" he said. "This is great! Priceless!! You son of a gun! What a chip off the old block! Only eighteen, and already you've got two women fighting over you!"
Newt found himself smiling, though the tears he had shed earlier were still wet on his face.
"Well, I guess it is kind of funny" he admitted. "But it didn't seem that way when it started. They've been fighting over me since Lauren and I turned sixteen."
Warren laughed even more at this revelation.
"That's even better!" he said. "Well, there's nothing like starting young. I guess we won't need that fatherly birds-and-bees chat then!"
"I guess not, and I'm well glad about it." Newt found himself sniggering nervously at the thought of such a chat.
"And how about that Theresa?" said Warren. "I've heard she's a bit of a minx, and she hangs out with Anita."
Newt thought about it.
"Well she doesn't call me Freak Boy or Hell Boy any more" he said. "And she's been telling me a lot of rude jokes recently."
Warren tutted and shook his head.
"Oho, you want to watch that one" he said. "That's how it always starts. First no insults, then the blue jokes. She's a little terror. She’ll be after you in no time."
"She's quite pretty actually" said Newt, as if it had only just occurred to him. "But I have to say that beehive hair is a bit scary. And her family scare me even more. Especially Jacqui."
"Yeah." Warren laughed again. "You don't want to mess with the McQueens, especially not Jacqui."

Warren looked serious for a moment, as he began to think about the situation.
"So if you're my son" he said, "do you need somewhere to stay while you're at college? Are you still getting on all right with Frankie and Jack?"
"Oh yeah, I'm fine." Newt smiled. "They really have become like a real family to me. But obviously I wanted to know who my real dad was. So that's why I kept on at Sheryl until she told me it was you. And you only live down the road from us anyway." Newt looked down at his hands for a moment.
"It wasn't easy for me to come here" he confessed quietly. "There was a time when I hated you. When we lost the pub..." he took a breath to steady his nerves, "and when you caught me tagging on the side of Evissa. You caught me doing that, yet you didn't thump me or anything."
Warren tapped the neck of his beer bottle thoughtfully against his chin.
"No, I didn't" he said. "Maybe it was the way you looked at me. You looked terrified. And somehow I could suddenly see myself at the same age, when I was doing similar things. Maybe even then I thought I might have a son somewhere, who might look a bit like you, only at the time I didn't know I was actually hoping for something like that. So when Spencer set the saucepan on fire and you ran off, I didn't try to follow you."

Warren stared into space for a while. Newt wondered what he was thinking.
I was so gutted when I accidentally shot Louise after she taunted me thought Warren. He closed his eyes for a moment. She was carrying my child too. A child that will never see the light of day now, gone forever, with her. Now suddenly I have a ready-made teenage son, who was right under my nose all this time!
He swallowed and looked into Newt's eyes again. Newt had gone past the emotional phase of being reunited with his father, now his brown eyes were two pools of Zen-like calmness.
"You know what, Newt... Barry...?"
"What, Dad?"
Warren smiled.
"Last year wasn't easy for me. It was one of the worst years of my life. Now you've come in here tonight to tell me all this - and suddenly I've got a son I never knew I had! It's wonderful... it's insane but it's great. When I think of all those birthdays I missed! Do you realize I owe you eighteen birthday presents? How can I get back all that lost time?"
"You don't have to even try" said Newt. "Just be there in my life. Don't desert me, like Mum did."
"Mate, I won't ever do that, now I know who you are." Warren clinked his beer bottle to the one in Newt's hand. "You're my son. If I had ever married Sheryl, people would be calling you Fox or Foxy now instead of Newt. That never happened, but you're still family. I can't tell you how much that means to me."
"It means a lot to me too" said Newt. "By the way, who would you choose, out of Lauren or Anita, if you were me?"
"I don't know..." Warren shrugged and glanced at the ceiling. "Your first one was Lauren, right?"
"Right."
"She was your first time, I take it? Where did you go for that?" He wondered why Newt suddenly looked very guilty.
"Evissa, New Year's Eve, two years ago" said Newt, staring down at the desk. Warren was amused to see that he was blushing.
"Well well!" He laughed, making Newt jump. "I can see people are getting more than just facials there, these days! And New Year's Eve, too! I bet that was good, starting the year with a bang."
Newt grinned.
"Yeah, it was pretty cool" he admitted. "And the funny thing was, Anita got there first, she had let herself in with her mum's key and had draped herself over the sofa - waiting for me. Only she didn't expect Lauren to be with me. So Lauren challenged her about that and threw her out."
This made Warren laugh again.
"But you haven't answered my question" said Newt. "Which one would you choose?"
Warren thought about it again.
"Let's see. Lauren was your first, and you were best mates with her for a year or so, right - anyway I remember seeing you two together a lot."
Newt nodded.
"But Anita is your most recent girlfriend, so she might seem more new and exciting."
"Anita's quiet" said Newt. "I love her soft feminine voice and the fact that she's a bit shy. She's clumsy sometimes, which makes me laugh. But Lauren seems to know what I'm going to say before I say it. She's pretty and all that, but she can be loud and aggressive. She also makes me laugh sometimes."
"Which one do you fancy the most?" asked Warren.
"Maybe Anita has a slight advantage there" said Newt. "But Lauren has a way of moving and walking... how can I put it? She has a sexy confidence about her. She's sensuous, I guess. It's not easy to decide. Sometimes confidence or shyness can be sexy. Sometimes I need someone exciting and new; sometimes I need a best friend. But other times, they both drive me nuts."
"Well there's your answer, Son, if you really want to hear it." Warren smiled and held out his hands, like a wise prophet. "Choose neither of them. Keep them as friends, go to college and see what turns up there. There could be all kinds of exciting girls at college."
Newt smiled. He found this advice too outrageous to take seriously, but he liked being promoted from "Mate" to "Son".
"Thanks Dad" he said. "I'll let you know if I do find someone new. Maybe I'll bring her round some time. If I can find anyone remotely interested in me, that is."
"Yeah, do that" Warren smiled. "Don't underestimate yourself, by the way. You have that fatal Fox charm and good looks, kid. You could have anyone you want!"
Newt laughed, but it seemed that last statement was sincere, from the look on Warren's face.
"Another thing that might interest you" said Warren. "You might want a job to help pay your college fees. Well there's some extra help needed behind the bar, if you want to do that some evenings. You can fit it around your studies."
"Really?! That would be cool, thanks Dad." Newt glanced around the desk and saw a picture of Katy, Warren's younger sister.
"How is Katy these days?" he asked.
"You do realize now that she's your Aunt Katy!" said Warren. "She's fine. I get emails from her now and then." He looked sad for a moment.

Newt drank down the rest of his beer and looked at Warren, wondering if the subject of Katy might be a painful thing to talk about. Then Warren spoke again.
"Listen Newt, I missed all of your birthdays, not knowing that you were my son. Is there anything I could buy for you, that might make up for that?"
Newt shrugged.
"You don't have to" he said. "Like I said, I know you're my father now, and you're fine with it, so that's enough."
"But is there something you always wanted, seriously? Business is good... please let me do this one thing."
"Well..." Newt thought about it. "When we lost The Dog in the Pond, I started a savings account with a fiver, and sold my electric guitar to try to raise some money to buy it back again, when Frankie and Jack were so upset about not being owners any more. So..."
"You sold your electric guitar?" Warren suddenly looked emotional again, to think of Newt making such a sacrifice for his foster family.
"I meant, maybe you could somehow get The Dog back for us again. Not a guitar for me." Newt looked at him humbly, feeling as if he had asked too much.
"Nev wouldn't give The Dog up without a fight" said Warren. "But I'll get you the guitar anyway. We can't have you getting out of practise. And we can't have you looking like a rock star with no guitar to play, that just wouldn't be cool." He patted Newt's shoulder. Newt smiled again, feeling slightly more understanding of the man he had previously disliked so much. Whatever his feelings had been about him, Warren was his father and deserved respect, at least for that.
"That's nice of you Dad, thanks. You've made me feel slightly better about the thing with Lauren and Anita too. I guess I'd better go home now and try and get some sleep before college tomorrow."
"OK. Thanks for coming round."

Newt stood up and was almost overwhelmed again when Warren hugged him before he left. He went back home feeling slightly better about life, despite all the hassles with Lauren and Anita, and his worries about how much they hated each other. At least he knew who his father was now. Even if his Warren was a criminal, he seemed to be doing well with his legal businesses; it seemed to Newt that maybe he might get back on the straight and narrow one day.

When he got back home, he went upstairs and was shocked to find the door of his room open. The lamp was on and Cindy was standing near his bedside table, looking at one of his sketch books.
"What are you doing in here?" he shouted. It made Cindy jump, but she soon regained her composure.
"Frankie sent me up to see why you left in such a hurry and slammed the front door" she said. "She thought maybe you had an urgent email from someone or something. She thought there might be some kind of clue in your room. And your door was open so I..."
"So you just thought you'd come in and have a snoop around? I thought you would have gone home by now, anyway. Surely Darren must miss you by now?"
"Oh, he's usually had a few beers by now on a Sunday" she said, with a dismissive wave of her hand. "He'll be asleep in front of the TV."
"And why didn't Frankie come up herself to my room? Not that I want her snooping in here either..."
"She went round to Steph's, to see if you were with her. She said she would try Leo's place next, to see if you were talking to Lauren. Jack went with her. They were worried, you don't usually slam the door like that."
"Oh." Newt looked guilty for a moment, realizing that he should have told Frankie he was going out for an hour. Even now that he was eighteen, Frankie still worried that he might have a schizophrenic episode and suddenly run off. He glared at Cindy when he had time to think about it.
"I slammed the door because of you" he said. "You have that effect on me. I had to get away for some fresh air... I think I must be allergic to you! And what are you doing with my sketch book?! Give it back!" He reached out but she held it further away.
"You're not a bad artist, you know" she said calmly, smirking at him.
"You shouldn't be looking through my things!" Newt was furious now, ignoring the compliment. He put his hands either side of her against the wall, trapping her there.
"Give it back!" he said. She looked up at him wide-eyed, looking satisfyingly afraid for a split second before seeming calm again.
"I'm waiting." Newt glared into Cindy's eyes with as much venom as he could muster. "Did I ever tell you I always hated you?" he said, quietly but firmly.
"That's a bit harsh" she said. "I've always enjoyed laughing at you. I'd miss that, if you ever went away."
Newt blinked at her. Confusion began to mingle with his hatred.
"Cindy, cut the crap and give me my sketch book back" he ordered sourly. "I need it for college tomorrow. I'm too tired for all this."
"Can't I just see a few more of the drawings?" She looked at him in a mock-pleading way, batting her eyelashes. He tried to grab it from her hand and she almost broke away from him, so he grabbed her wrists and pinned them to the wall.

Cindy dropped the sketch book as Newt tightened his grip on her wrists. He was out of breath now; feeling tired yet strangely fired up. Cindy looked at him with genuine fear in her eyes again.
"Is this what you've always wanted all along, Cindy?" he asked quietly, trembling with subdued anger. "Winding me up all these years so we could have some kind of final showdown? Sneering at me, calling me Freak, and - when you lived here with us - wandering around in your underwear, hogging the TV remote control, treating my things like they don't matter..."
He was still breathing raggedly and so was she.
"Remember when I threw water over your head, in the Dog, a couple of years ago?" he said.
Too scared to speak, she nodded.
"Now that was funny. Thanks for the laughs. I'd do that again any time."
They stared at each other again. Newt relaxed his grip on her wrists and she pushed her hands hard against him, making him cry out in surprise, so he grabbed her wrists again and pushed them to the wall.
"Are you going to get out of my room now?" he asked. "Or am I going to pick you up and carry you out?"
Once again Cindy tried to stare him out. He leaned closer until his nose was almost touching hers.



"What's it going to be?" he whispered, menacingly. For some strange reason he couldn't fathom out, his heart was hammering wildly. Cindy stared back and began to push violently against his hands, trying to wrestle him away.

Then the world seemed to go quietly insane for a moment. Newt was not quite sure how it happened, but suddenly the wrestling slowed down and he was kissing her, while she kissed him back with passion, turning the tables as she turned around and pressed him against the wall...

--------------------

To be continued.....

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 4.
by PinkyA


"Wait!" Newt gasped, as Cindy stopped kissing him to take a breath. "We can't do this! It's wrong!"
He tried to push against Cindy, but his arms felt strangely weak. Cindy only smiled at him.
"Wrong" she murmured. "Exactly. Don't you see? That's why it feels so right!" Newt was about to reply but she kissed his neck, reminding him of a sexy vampire movie he had once seen. He closed his eyes and his knees seem to turn to jelly. She kissed his lips again and he kissed her back warmly, hating himself yet loving every second of it.



When she pushed his arms up and pulled his T shirt off over his head, he had no fight left, except to reach out and turn the key in his bedroom door, in case Frankie and Jack came back too soon.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

"I'm sorry Newt wasn't here, but it's been nice seeing you" said Steph, as Frankie and Jack put their coats on. "Maybe he went to the SU Bar to have a few beers, after all, that will be his local once he's at college. I'm sure he can't have gone far."
"Thanks love," said Frankie. "We'll try there next, then we'll have to go home I suppose, and if he hasn't come back, I'll just have to assume he's missing because of forgetting his meds, or something."
Steph gave Frankie a hug.
"Don't worry Mum" she said. "He's eighteen now, don't forget. I'm sure he can look after himself by now."
"And don't forget, Frankie, Newt's very responsible these days" said Jack. "He'll want a good night's sleep before commencing his college education tomorrow."


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Meanwhile, back at the flat, Newt was getting the education of a lifetime, from Cindy. They had moved from the bed to the floor and clothes had been carelessly flung in all directions. Newt was seeing Cindy through new eyes now, as if seeing her for the first time. She was brash, bold, daring and beautiful, brimming with confidence, and her lithe body made her seem like a goddess. She was not evil - only extremely naughty. Even while he hated himself, deep down, his hatred of Cindy had lost its edge. He could no longer think or speak; all logic had melted away. Everything was about the sense of touch.

As Cindy smiled and held him close, he heard his mobile phone ringing from his bedside drawer unit - and blissfully ignored it.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Lauren began to pout, feeling somewhat annoyed as Newt's number rang and rang with no reply. Eventually she heard Newt's voice say "Hey there, I'm not here right now, say a few words after the tone and I'll get back to you. Cheers."
"Well maybe I'll get back to you some time, if I can be bothered" she said aloud, frowning at her mobile. She ended the call before saying that, however. She was finding it harder and harder to pretend that she didn't still love Newt, even after everything that had gone wrong between them.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

"No, sorry, we've not seen anyone of that description" said the blonde girl behind the bar at the SU Bar. "I'm sure I would have remembered a tall guy with Emo hair with a red streak. I have a bit of a thing about guys with Emo hair or long hair. So no... sorry!"
Jack and Frankie looked at each other with slightly more worry in their eyes.
"We could try Mr. Roy's house" said Jack. "He might be with Anita."
"All right" said Frankie. They left the SU Bar as quickly as they could, feeling more worried than ever.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Newt's final surrender to Cindy had felt exquisitely-sweet at the time; now the bitterness of regret was troubling him. He lay staring at the ceiling, having never looked at it from the floor before. As Cindy watched him, his expression faded from ethereal bliss to worry; and from worry to a frown.
"What's the matter Newt?" she asked him softly, toying with his hair.
"What have I done?" he whispered. He looked at her with intense angst clouding his eyes. "What have we done, to Darren?"
"It's all right, Newtie," she said, kissing his cheek. "If we never tell him, he'll never have to know."
"Lies don't make everything all right" said Newt. "And what have you done to me, you terrible woman?! I can't even hate you anymore! I used to love hating you! Now look at me - right behind enemy lines... in the clutches of..."
"You're so funny!" Cindy smiled and stroked his hair. "What harm could I ever do to you? So what if you're in my clutches? You could have walked away any time, but look... you're still here."
"It still feels so wrong." Newt's eyes were suddenly brimming with tears. "It felt so much better when I hated you." His tears spilled, so he closed his eyes, aching with shame. "Now what can I do?" He turned his face away, desperately embarrassed to cry in front of her. Cindy leaned over and kissed the tears from his cheek, tasting salt. As she caught sight of his sudden vulnerability, she was moved to wrap her arms around him, pulling him closer.
"But I never hated you" she said. "And I like you even more now. I don't even want to laugh at you anymore. Newt, you're amazing! Maybe I used to tease you once, but you're eighteen now, and you're one of the most gorgeous, sexy men I've ever seen. I still love Darren - but there's something about you. You're not like everyone else. You're... exotic.
Newt blinked at her and took a deep breath, feeling more confused than ever.
"Exotic?" he repeated, tensing up as she gently smoothed his hair back from his face.
"Yes." Cindy smiled warmly at him. He began to relax slightly. "Exotic" she said. "Weird but wonderful; like a rock star, or like a big jungle cat. You're amazing."
Newt was too surprised to answer, so he only smiled. Then he glanced at the clock. It was getting too late to ignore it.
"Cindy... it's eleven forty five" he said. "Frankie and Jack might get home soon. Maybe we should get dressed."
"All right." Cindy kissed him one more time, then she got up and began to hunt around for her clothes. She found most of them right away, but was amused to find that her bra was draped over Newt’s laptop screen. She got dressed more quickly than he did; she had her coat on and was ready to leave by the time they heard Frankie's key turn in the front door. Once Frankie and Jack were in the house, Newt was in the bathroom running a bath, and Cindy was near the front door.
"Cindy, have you seen Newt?" asked Frankie, as she walked in.
"Yes - he came back in when I was about to leave, but then he ran upstairs and locked himself in his room. He wouldn't come out no matter what I said to him" said Cindy. "I guess when he heard I was going downstairs to go home, he sneaked out and now he's running a bath. Anyway, don't worry Frankie - he's fine."
"Oh, thank God for that!" Frankie looked as though she could cry with relief. Jack gave her a hug.

Upstairs in the bathroom, Newt lit candles around the bath, then put the light off, threw off his towel and got into the foamy water, closing his eyes. As he leaned back he let out a deep sigh, held his breath and submerged his head under the water for a while, as if trying to drown the noise of his confused thoughts. He knew it would be all he could do to remember to take his anti-schizophrenia medication, after an evening that had played such havoc with his emotions. While he was submerged, he thought about the two paradoxes that he had confronted that night - first the man he hated who turned out to be his father - then the bizarre sexual encounter with a woman he had hated almost from the first time he had seen her. When he resurfaced again, he shook the water out of his hair and rubbed his eyes. He knew that he was slightly late taking his medication, which meant that he should not linger too long in the bath, but must get out and take his pill as soon as possible.

Newtos said a solemn, familiar voice inside his head.
Fasten your seat belt and hold on tight! The rest of your life starts here.
He tried to ignore Eli's all-too-familiar voice, as Frankie banged on the bathroom door.
"Newt!" she shouted. "Are you going to be much longer in there? It's almost midnight, and Jack and I need to use the bathroom too - eventually!"
Newt glanced at the bathroom door and a wicked grin curved the corners of his mouth. He could think of only one word by way of a reply; an urban word that summed up his mood for the evening, now that he was exhausted enough to be able to sleep that night.
"Meh" he muttered, under his breath...


---------------------------------


To be continued.....

OK here is Episode #5, episode 7 should have an illustration... #6 coming soon...

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 5.
by PinkyA

When Newt finally got to bed, he took his medication before lying down. The voice of Eli in his head earlier had deeply troubled him. It was Eli's voice, two years ago, that once said to him "Now there's a real woman" when he had walked in on Darren and Cindy, and she had been wearing only her bra and a short skirt. It had been Eli that planted that thought in his mind - now that buried idea had surfaced, and he had somehow ended up having sex with her.

Lying in bed, with slightly damp hair from the bath, it was almost easy for Newt to pretend that it had never happened; that he had only fallen asleep and dreamed it. Only one small thing gave away the fact that it had been real - the tiny crescent-shaped marks on the backs of his hands, from where they had fought before the kissing started, and she had tried to get him to let go of her wrists, by digging her nails into him. So now he lay awake, thankful for the slightly sedative side-effect of his night medication, waiting for it to kick in so that he could sleep. All the while, he was hating himself, now that he could no longer hate Cindy. In spite of all the most breathtaking things she had taught him during their passionate hour together, his most vivid memory was the way her slightly mocking smile had melted to a much softer expression when she finally surrendered herself to him. He couldn't get that beautiful look out of his head, even while he agonized over how it would hurt Darren if he ever found out. It was exactly as she had said; the wrongness made it feel right - or made it more exciting.

Eventually the mild sedative in the drug began to kick in and he slept.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

At college the next day, Newt stood in the corridor with a queue of new students waiting to get their registration forms. Time seemed to be dragging, so he phoned The Loft to see if Warren was there. As luck would have it, Warren answered, rather than Ravi.
"Dad" said Newt, quietly, in case the other students might listen out of boredom. "I need to talk to you tonight. I have a problem and I don't think there's anyone else I can talk to about it."
"All right Newt" said Warren kindly. "More girl trouble, is it?"
"A good guess." Newt glanced down the corridor. He stepped forward one pace, as one of the students went into the registration office.
"Well I'm your man for those kinds of problems. Come round about seven, I won't be too busy around that time."
"Thanks Dad. 'Bye."
"'Bye Son." Warren ended the call.

Once Newt was registered with the college, he went to his first tutorial, which was graphic art, on the subject of incorporating photography into design for food advertising. Some impressive-looking salads had been prepared by Dom Hutchinson for the occasion, and the students all had to photograph the food, then Bluetooth the images to their computers and typeset some advert titles and ad copy around the photos, as if it was a real advert for a major restaurant. They also had to make up the name of the restaurant and design a logo.

This kept Newt happily absorbed for a while, until a girl at the next computer desk caught his eye. She had long black hair with red streaks at the front, like his own hair. He could only see her in profile, as she studied her computer screen. There was something strangely familiar about that profile, and the golden-brown skin. When she saw him looking and turned, his heart seemed to stop for a second.
"Anita?" he said. She smiled.
"Newt!"
Newt laughed.
"You little copy-cat!" he said. "When did you get your hair done like that? It matches mine!"
"Yesterday afternoon." she looked slightly embarrassed. "Well it seemed like you were finishing with both me and Lauren, and I wanted to give you a sign that I didn't want to lose you. And I had already applied to come here, but I was afraid to tell you in case you thought I enrolled here because of you - I wanted to go to college anyway."
"Cool." Newt smiled. He was surprised at how glad he was to see her. Then the art tutor, Bob Cranwell, came up.
"Well I'm glad you're having a nice chat, you two" he said. "But you need to try and imagine this is a working day in an advertising agency. You are working to a deadline; your client wants results, not excuses. So yeah, if you were at work you might have a chat, but remember to manage your time as well. If you want to finish this in time for your design presentations later this week, try to keep your breaks short and get as much done as you can."
"OK, thanks Bob" said Newt. He was glad to notice that the college tutors did not seem as patronizing or severe as schoolteachers had been. He had to force himself to concentrate now; his mind was once more overloaded with thoughts of Anita - and Lauren - and now Cindy, on top of all his other complications.

The graphics tutorial went smoothly once he managed to become inspired and dream up a restaurant name and sketch out a logo, which he quickly scanned in and took into Photoshop, with just minutes to spare until the hour was up. Afterwards, he saw Anita in the corridor.
"Are you coming to the Social Studies group, 'Nita?" he asked.
"No... sorry. It's not one of my subjects. I'm going to be bricklaying this afternoon."
Newt raised his eyebrows.
"Bricklaying?"
Anita laughed.
"April Fool!" she said. Newt laughed. He had forgotten it was the first of April.
"No, actually I've got History tutorial" she said. "I think Graphics is the only one we both do at the same time."
Newt gave her a hug.
"Well I'll look forward to Graphics more, then" he said. She seemed reluctant to let go of him after the hug.
"OK, see you later" she said.
"See you." Newt smiled and walked away to his Social Studies tutorial.

When Newt walked into the Social Studies room, he saw that he was not the only unconventional-looking person in the room. There were a couple of Goths, one Emo girl - and Josh Ashworth was there too. His hair was fairly long and distinctly Emo-looking. Newt overheard him talking to the Emo girl about forming a band, while the group was waiting for the tutor to arrive.
"Hi Josh!" he said.
"Hi Newt!" Josh smiled at him. "I didn't know you were into Social Studies. This is Evette."
"Allo!" said Evette. Her French accent was charming. Newt felt a flutter of attraction as she smiled at him from behind her shaggy black-and-pink streaked hair. He smiled back and shook her hand, which felt dainty and smooth in his.
"You're French?" he asked, and immediately felt foolish, as it seemed obvious.
"Actually I am from Belgium" she said. "I speak French and Dutch."
"Wow" was all Newt could think of by way of reply.
"It is very nice to meet you, Newt" she said, and kissed him on both cheeks. Newt was too stunned to speak for a moment. Then he remembered what Josh had been talking about.
"You're still in a band?" he asked Josh.
"Yeah, well not with Michaela and Amy any more, although I still live with Amy. I was the only guy before, and Michaela told me she wanted to be in a girl band. I need more cool-looking people, who can play guitars or keyboards."
"I play guitar" said Newt.
"And you look cool" remarked Evette, with a distinctly flirtatious grin. Newt grinned back but could not find his voice to reply.
"So you have an electric guitar?" Josh looked surprised.
"Well I did have." Newt looked sad for a moment. "Then I sold it. But my Dad said he might get me a new one."
"I didn't think Jack would splash out on stuff like that these days" said Josh, trying vainly to be tactful about the Osborne's financial situation.
"It's not Jack" said Newt, "it's my real Dad. I recently found out who it is."
"What?" Josh looked amazed. "Who is it?"
"Warren Fox." Newt shrugged, as if he couldn't believe it either, as Josh's mouth fell open.
"Warren? Who owns the Loft and Evissa? Wow, he could get you two or three guitars if he wanted! Well look, write down your mobile number and I'll text you when I've found someone for keyboards. We might even be able to meet sooner, I have a drummer already."
Newt smiled, trying not to look at Evette as he scribbled down his mobile number for Josh.
"Thanks Mate." Josh smiled and put the number in his top pocket. "Why don't you sit with us for this tutorial and we can talk about it more at lunchtime?"
"All right, thanks." Newt smiled and sat down near Josh and Evette, just as the tutor walked in.
"Hi, I'm James Matthews" said the tutor. "Now what are all your names...?"


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Cindy was daydreaming as she and Steph waited for customers at MOBs. Until the night before, her favourite daydream had been about the kind of place that she and Darren would move into, once he was able to get a good job. Now she was almost annoyed to find herself daydreaming about a boy who had once poured water over her head, who was now turning into an interesting young man.
What is it about Newt? she wondered, tracing her fingertips idly over the counter.
Since when did he suddenly turn into this tall, pale, shaggy-haired love god with a five o'clock shadow, wicked smile and athletic muscles?

She knew that having sex with him was wrong - yet it had felt amazingly right. She had also found out things about him that she would not have dreamed of, such as his energy, his gentleness, and the way he had been so hurt by his conscience afterwards, because of Darren. In the bedroom, Newt was better than she would ever have imagined. Exciting, almost dangerous - yet sweet - which was such a surprise to her.
Newt's adorable! she thought. All those times when he has looked sullen or bored - it's all a front. He's a honey!
She bit her lip and looked down at the table, smiling, reddening slightly in the face when Steph glanced over at her.
"A bit slow today, isn't it" sighed Steph.
"It's overcast, that's why" said Cindy, dreamily. "All dark and moody... I mean, cloudy. Not warm enough for cool drinks."
"Are you all right, Cindy?" Steph peered round at her as if she had gone slightly mad.
"Yeah, never better. Why?" Cindy could not quite wipe the silly, dreamy-eyed smile off her face as she looked at Steph.
"Oh, has Darren's libido woken up then, recently?" asked Steph, grinning back at her.
"No - yeah... well it never went to sleep..." Cindy appeared to almost be unsure what she really meant to say. Steph laughed.
"Oh, I get it - you're playing away! Ha ha!! Well that's not like you, Cindy, is it?"
Cindy had been toying with an orange. When Steph said this, she looked suddenly guilty and accidentally dropped it.
"I never said -"
"You didn't have to!" Steph laughed again. "You've been acting like the cat that got the cream all morning."
"Have I?" Cindy tried to look innocent, but she was not fooling Steph.
"Yes." Steph eyed her suspiciously.
"Oh don't worry" she said, raising her eyebrows. "Cindy, I know you'll crack in the end. I'll have his name out of you by the end of the week."
"Wanna bet?" Cindy folded her arms.
"If you like throwing money away" said Steph. Cindy kicked the orange under the counter, rather than bothering to pick it up. Then she started daydreaming about Newt again, when he had been hunting around for his discarded clothes the previous night; and how pale and lean he looked in the lamp light...
"Do you like blueberries?" asked Steph.
"Looove them" purred Cindy, looking glassy-eyed.
"Well we had a big delivery of them earlier. Be a love and go and start unpacking them all, would you?"
"All right." Cindy rolled her eyes and went round to the back of the premises.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

At lunchtime, suddenly business at MOBs began to pick up. Steph was just round the back of the counter tidying up some empty boxes when the first of their customers arrived. Cindy looked up from the till - and there was Newt, with Josh, Evette and Anita. She looked into Newt's eyes.
"Hi Newt! What can I do for you?" she asked brightly. As she said it, Newt blushed to his boots and she felt the heat of a blush in her own face.
"A peach smoothie, please" he said softly, not taking his eyes from hers for too long a moment.
"Coming right up" she said, and tore her eyes away long enough to ask his friends what they wanted. Fortunately the others were chatting and did not notice the awkward moment between Newt and Cindy before it had passed...


---------------------------------


To be continued.....

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 6.
by PinkyA


After his first day at college, Newt half-heartedly celebrated for a while with Josh, Anita and Evette. He was too busy worrying about his sex escapade with Cindy to really let himself get into the mood of the occasion. Josh and Evette chatted to each other and Anita told him about her first day, in her quiet, gentle voice. He listened from time to time, about how she was worried about getting the Graphics project done by the end of the week, and some of the things she had done in the History tutorial, but his mind was not completely focussed.

When he left, Evette kissed him on both cheeks to say goodbye, and did the same to Anita, as Newt had agreed to walk her home before going to see Warren. They walked to her house in silence for most of the way, but when they stopped outside the gate of the Roys' house, she gave him a warm, affectionate look and took both his hands in hers.
"If you ever want to get back together" she said softly, "just say the word." She kissed his lips and he did not pull away, but let his mouth respond a little.
"You're very sweet, Anita" he said. He touched her face gently. "I just need a little time to adjust to being at college, then I'll get back to you on that one. I do still think a lot of you, I hope you know that."
"Yeah. All right. See you tomorrow Newt." She gave him a hug before he left her to let herself in.

As Newt walked away in the direction of the loft, his head was full of turmoil about Anita, Lauren - and now Cindy. Cindy had sparked a flame of passion within him that he never knew existed. The possibilities of sex with an older, more experienced woman had never occurred to him until his adventure with her on Sunday night, in his room. Even his first ride on a motorbike was nothing compared to the thrill of the wrongness - or the naughtiness, - of what had happened with her. Confusion and guilt tormented him as he went up the fire escape at the back of The Loft, to confide in Warren about it.

When Warren let him into the office, Newt could hear someone noisily setting up glasses in the bar next door, which he guessed was probably Ravi. He hoped that Ravi would not eavesdrop on the conversation.
"OK, Son, take a seat" said Warren, kindly. "Tell me about this girl trouble you mentioned earlier."
Newt sat down, nervously. In spite of Warren's kind tone of voice, he was well aware that he used to hate him before he found out that he was his real father. Even so, he had no-one else to turn to. There was no way that Frankie, Jack or Steph would understand.

As Warren sat down in the seat behind the desk, Newt took a deep breath.
"Dad... I had sex with an older woman" he said quietly. Warren looked very surprised, but did not laugh, to his great relief.
"Wow" said Warren, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "I did not expect you to come out with that. I thought you might say something about Lauren Valentine or Anita Roy."
"No." Newt shook his head. "And it gets worse. It was Cindy Cunningham." He closed his eyes, wincing, as if it hurt to say her name.
This time Warren did laugh, more from shock than amusement.
"Your foster brother's girlfriend?!" he said, incredulously. "Good God Newt, you don't do things by halves, do you?"
Newt stood up, red-faced, half-turning towards the door.
"Sorry. Look Newt... Son... sit down. I know this is serious. You just caught me by surprise, that's all. Maybe I can help."
Newt slowly sat down again, still looking as though he wanted to be elsewhere.
"Let me get you a beer while I think about this one" said Warren. "I think you have more than one choice here..."

Newt forced himself to stay seated while Warren went out to get him a bottled lager, even though Warren's words "your foster brother's girlfriend" had made his guilt over Cindy even more acute than before, bringing a lump to his throat. He made himself breathe more slowly and tried to think of something that might make him feel more calm - though nothing came to mind. He felt slightly more in control of his emotions when Warren came back with two beers. He took a long swig as Warren sat down again.
"Well, Son, I've had a minute or so to think about this; and it seems to me that you have one stronger option here, which would solve a lot of your guilt about this. Now Cindy's a woman, right - not some timid little girl - isn't she?"
You got that right thought Newt.
"Yeah..." he said aloud.
"And she's a woman of the world, she's tougher than you think" Warren went on. "Also you are no longer inexperienced - and you have a way with words. So just go and see her - and tell her, very kindly, that sex with her was wonderful, but it can never happen again. I'm sure she knows the score."
Newt thought about this. He glanced anxiously at Warren.
"Cindy is very strong-willed" he said. "What if she doesn't want to end it? What if she tries to kiss me and I'm too weak to resist?"
"I don't know." Warren shrugged. "You've got me there. You can only be strong enough to do what you really want to do. And you're eighteen - too young to settle down yet if you don't feel like it. You're old enough to know your own mind."
Newt suddenly found himself feeling emotional again. He took another long breath.
"But Dad - that's just it. I don't just have one mind, although the drugs make it seem that way. So often I've been in two minds about things... I'm schizophrenic! That makes it so much harder to make up my mind about anything." Newt sighed and swallowed hard. He decided to leave the rest of his beer in case it made him more depressed.
"Aww Mate, don't worry about it too much" said Warren. He reached across the table and patted Newt's arm. "You could try ending it on the phone, that way she can't get to you."
"I can't do that." Newt sighed again and a single tear spilled. He tried to ignore it. "I'll have to tell her in person, it wouldn't be fair to just call or text with something like that."
"Well, Son, you're a better man than me" said Warren. "Just give yourself a few minutes to get yourself together, then go round and see her as soon as you can, just try to make sure Darren isn't there of course. Maybe ask her round to see you."
"Good idea." Newt nodded and bit thoughtfully on his lip ring. "Thanks Dad, you've helped more than you know." Newt managed a smile. "I'll go back home now and see if I can get Cindy to come round, so I can tell her."


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

When Newt got back home to his room, he rang Darren's number and asked to speak to Cindy, saying that Frankie wanted her to go round to the flat, to have a word with her. This worked like a charm; at least to not make Darren suspicious. Cindy came round very quickly and Newt sneaked her up to his room before Frankie could see who had come to call. For all Frankie knew, it could have been Anita. Newt quickly locked his bedroom door. When Cindy saw him lock the door, a naughty smile appeared on her lips.
"I had to get you to come round" he said. Cindy raised her eyebrows, seductively peeling off her coat as she did so.
"What can I do for you?" she asked softly. "Do you want to be my peach smoothie again?" she said, with a wicked wink.
Newt almost forgot what he had to say for a moment.
"No... no. The thing is, Cindy, I wanted to say to you that what happened last night must never happen again. We just can't do that to Darren. It's not right."
Cindy looked at him straight in the eyes. Then she opened her mouth as if she was going to say something.
What is she going to do now? Newt wondered. Is she going to try and kiss me? Will I be able to stop her??
But Cindy took him by surprise, by doing something he would never have believed such a confident, self-assured, cheeky woman would do; thereby making all of his defences crumble in a heartbeat.

She burst into tears....


---------------------------------


To be continued.....

OK Gang, this is just a fairly short episode - but illustrated...

NEWT: Self-Discovery: 7.
by PinkyA

"Cindy?"
Newt blinked at Cindy. She was not sobbing loudly; the sound was a kind of audible shiver, as tears streamed down her cheeks. He stepped closer to her, with an uncertain look in his eyes. His resolve to insist that they must never have sex again was melting away by the second; even though he knew that he had asked her to come round just so that he could finish it. He simply had no resistance when it came to women or girls looking vulnerable.
"Cindy... Cinders... awww... hey, don't cry..."
He pulled her into his arms, stroking her hair.
"Please don't cry" he whispered. "This isn't like you Cindy" he added softly, fascinated that someone like her could go to pieces right in front of him. "Come over here and sit down..."

He led her to his bed, to sit beside him, elbowing a pair of spare jeans out of the way as he sat down and put his arms round her.
"Hey Cinders" he said. "Look at me, come on. This can't just be about me, or that one night we had. What's wrong?"
Cindy shook her head, looking embarrassed.
"I - I can't say" she groaned. "It's so private..."
"Try me" said Newt. So she did.
"I've been so lonely." She closed her eyes for a moment. "Darren just hasn't been the same since he got out of prison. He's not so enthusiastic about our... love life anymore."
Newt nodded, taking in her meaning.
"Then Ash Roy kept winding me up, pretending he had some glamorous promotion work for one of his businesses, but it usually turned out to be something stupid like dressing up as a beef burger to hand out leaflets about Relish. My life was becoming so frustrating... then last night happened... with you. It just made me feel - I don't know - more alive somehow. It was wonderful."
"Really?" Newt stared at her, fidgeting uneasily, wondering where her revelations might be leading.
"I've said too much!" Her voice shivered with emotion and she turned her face away.
"Cindy..." Newt touched her shoulders as if trying to turn her round to face him. Reluctantly she turned her tear-streaked face around. He took a tissue out of the box by his bed and gently dried her eyes.
"All right Cinders" he said gently "You can stay in here for a while until you get yourself together. The door is locked, so no-one can burst in on us."
"Thanks Newt."

Newt looked into Cindy's reddened eyes and saw that she looked younger - almost innocent - with some of her makeup smudged away. Before he quite knew what he was doing, he leaned his face closer to hers, kissed her forehead, then nuzzled his nose to hers. In the next moment she had lifted her face so that her lips brushed lightly against his. When that happened there were two voices in Newt's head; one screaming NO! and the other screaming YES!!. The "yes" voice seemed to drown out the negative one, so he let his mouth respond to her kiss; and this time there was no self-hatred at all. It was a moment all suffused with sweetness, as Cindy moved closer to kiss and embrace him, with all guile and pretence left behind.
Why did I ever hate her? he thought. She's about as dangerous as a kitten.
Yet almost as soon as he had this thought, Newt saw the danger. As he kissed Cindy, he realized too late that once again, the situation was sliding out of control. Somehow, between kisses, he and Cindy were undressing each other with feverish speed - and the only reason he couldn't stop - was because he didn't want to.



Oh Cindy murmured his thoughts, before they melted out altogether.
Touch me... hold me...

Once again Newt's mobile rang, followed by Cindy's phone, as if to underline the fact that they were both needed elsewhere...


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To be continued.....

Wow what a great read, can't wait for the next part. Glad i didn't have to wait between those you posted too Amazing fanfic and art as usual PinkyA

Just wanna say i really like this!
And along with the illustrations, its really good


x

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Newt <3
Darren <3
Justin <3
Ravi <3
Kris <3

wow really good story:D x!!x

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Lauren*&*Newt <3 foreveer:)